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HOW TO PASS A DRUG TEST


Whoa what the heck happened here Patreon dude, yeah Patreon… Donate to Patreon… Patreon Patreon dude! Fucking Patreon man See you next time man welcome back to the episode of What’s in this video today? Hey, dude, I fucked up this week. I don’t have two items cuz we all got lost in transit I only have one so that means you guys officials over here Wow dude. Thank you so much This is your second right now cool. I always wanted this. That’s actually my yes awesome Miniature squiggly Cup, that’s it. I’ll I that’s my hair. That’s my hair Oh, that’s my hair. What’d you put in your hair? I did put it in my hair Holy shit, you can keep your keep the bit going if you want Wow dude this is mine. Thank you so much, okay? I’ll give you your gift the fuck where’d you get this off Amazon? No, I got that off of the Rooster Teeth store it might not be available yet, but it will be soon Miniature fucking squiggly cups I got you something Dude You’ve been reading a lot nope You gonna start reading a lot yeah, what would you say this country is right now? In one word It’s on a it’s on a flat earth Okay, what about politically? Dry, that’s why I got something nice and juicy right here three the next couple of weeks at that fucking segue Dude, what he did not give me the fucking Great misters fucking hell dead, dude you actually fire in fury epic tale of the Donald Trump And how he conquered his way up to victory is this like it’s like kind of like drama in this book There’s a lot of drama in here the secret to communicating with Trump What is that? It tells you in this book what the secret is I had a lot of shit in this is $40 for this book here Well, I can’t say that I’m not actually gonna read this very like I like read anything from Because I thought you’d like read like something for me no Raj it is this your only package you got for me This is my only package that came, but I think I’m thinking it’s a good one all right I’m thinking it’s a good one so nice a little callback from a video that we did back in year one Entitled the STD challenge. It’s a little throwback to that from the creators of From from the creators of these these Dicks here that actually had the the squirty tube and everything where’s the other one. It’s fine. You can have this one if you want It’s right there let me look for it Look for it. I’m not fucking helping you copy that for a debris. I’m not that’s your mess. Can you take me a present? Keating the present No, it’d be really fully No put it back there It wouldn’t be funny. It’s stupid. It’s fucking stop. It’s fucking old. Dude. It’s old. It’s done already Stop we didn’t even get to the second present yet You don’t need to do this like good doing that cuz we’ve been building No, you don’t you just put it right back under the fucking I was gonna say the fridge you put it under the fucking sofa I hate you God damn it. Dude you son of a bitch We’re gonna have to take a little sponson break Hey there welcome to this week’s sponsor Dollar Shave Club They’re not new they’ve been sponsoring the show for a long time And I should hope you fucking appreciate it guys isn’t it a pain in the ass when you go to the store? You try and buy some razors, and then like there’s no one around You don’t know what razor to buy the razors are locked up behind like the plastic thing next to the Tide Pods And you’re like oh what am I supposed to do? What do I choose? How do I live my life? You know right now Dollar Shave Club is offering their shit shave and shower starter kit for basically five dollars for new members Do you know what’s inside this box and you open it up here and seen the inside of one of these boxes? This is a critical moment you’re about to experience some of our most special products They’re probably gonna become a part of your life Everyday this starter set features their executive razor and three trial sized versions of their most popular Products that help you stay fresh and clean in your first box You will receive their shave butter body wash and one wipe Charlies Butt wipes you will also receive their executive ray Which includes their premium waiting handle and phulka set of cartridges after the first box replacement cartridges are sent for only a few bucks a month Dollar Shave Club comm $5 don’t get stuck in the door like me will be your best self This offer is exclusively available dollarshaveclub.com Couch shop Dollar Shave Club comm Couch shop, they’ll have you covered from face cheeks to butt cheeks Gotta go So fuck is this don’t don’t Wiz in tour so What that is oh god here? We go upside down what that is? You’re you you use these kits here to pass a drug test and somebody I know I know at least one Rustler was was busted with this here and They got fired this. Hope kit. They say they can’t pass it right now. I don’t think you could pass it right now, so I Figured maybe you’d want to give it a go give it a test run See how it works, and if a drug test ever comes up, then at least you got your you’re pretty prepared, okay Yeah, I see yeah tie this up around you. Yeah, you actually put it on you put it on you make it you you come You you you’re supposed to do it you come You you you’re supposed to do it you come Like you make it come out of your your fly oh I see Yep I Was pretty real man is this to like? Fake it yeah for whatever reason they look like in case they look to see if you have something. I’ll see a dick yeah be like I Said that’s his dick That look like yours. What’s that? Yeah? It’s a little bigger That’s what it is Well What are you doing are you trying to transfer them oh? Man get it all over my hands, dude. Why don’t you just want a cup oh? Man Jesus Christ It’s coyote. How how do you have a cup what? one of my squiggly cups yeah, so you put the pee in here Okay Did you not give me the reaction I wanted And then I didn’t didn’t really want you to Die just that I’m not gonna use it now if you’re just gonna be sad about it What do you want me to be excited about you using my school life? No yeah, that is a no But you’re doing it anyway, so I can’t Do it yet don’t do it. That’s not that’s convincing don’t Don’t do it Which what type of emotion just give me an idea anger would undo it Whoa That won’t that will get you to pass the drug test You don’t need to do that you listen to it too to see if their finger hits it Oh there you go Yeah, that’s a lot That’s a lot you should go go put it on You don’t have to do that here. I’ll just take long as you’re afraid go to bathroom well You got to go pee in the bathroom anyway do what you’re not gonna. You’re gonna gonna. Pee here. Are you gonna be here? Can you put it in you’re gonna leave it like that you can’t just leave it like that what I Thought you walk in I sir Manual drug tests we’d like for you to take us We’d like for you to take a take a piss test all right You have to peel this cup we’ll test it later, and see you know how they do it like right here You just have to you just have to pee what’s happening. What’s happening hmm So I think you’re fired You’re absolutely fired get out of here pack your things shit, I wanna stop anyway Jesus Christ, are you ready for your next gift today. Yep. Hello, sir step right up Oh Like a pizza earlier for lunch of those oh It’s so much la machine it looks bigger in the pictures oh This is perfect. Yeah does it take quarters takes coins takes Punky’s. I don’t have any you wanna buy some How much what you got I don’t know my wallet Damn it fucking is stupid fucking carnival one dollar. Let’s probably get me Pretty good amount of tokens yo bitch. It’s fucking more than a dollar for these two days They’re like quarters though. You know it’s three dollars a game three dollars. Yeah five dollars for two games. Oh My god think I’m worth a fucking dollar Three dollars sure three dollars Perfect okay, that’ll be one token for you Then we’re heading Who’s this You put it in there sure what I won that dog Are those my keys? What are those my keys where? And there’s my keys well it appears to be the grand prize a set of keys It’s watching this week’s episode of Amazon make sure to check out some other videos We’ve got going on this channel as well as the SUBSCRIBE feature, which if you click that? Who knows where you’re gonna get in your YouTube homepage probably no this Is it the algorithm well hey we also got a merch store check that out as well and our patreon Thanks for watching guys, and thank you to our sponsors

100 Comments

  1. Erudite Enigma
    Erudite Enigma February 25, 2018

    "Are those my keys?"

  2. Spiderkhaos89
    Spiderkhaos89 February 25, 2018

    james and aleks are the best youtube couple, by far, lmao

  3. Memecraft Live to meme
    Memecraft Live to meme February 25, 2018

    That last part tho 😂😂😂

  4. minecrafthero101
    minecrafthero101 February 25, 2018

    who remembers the giraffe picture from road to E3 behind them

  5. Marcus Carcus
    Marcus Carcus February 25, 2018

    Did James gain weight again?

  6. escajeda2010
    escajeda2010 February 25, 2018

    What video was when they broke the shelf

  7. ImJustSaiyan
    ImJustSaiyan February 25, 2018

    8:12–8:30 just click and watch

  8. Rhys Thomas
    Rhys Thomas February 26, 2018

    What the fuck did I just watch

  9. •L_• Nanni?
    •L_• Nanni? February 26, 2018

    So when is the uncensored version ?

  10. Evan Sheehan
    Evan Sheehan February 26, 2018

    9:14 EVERYONE JUST CUT TO THAT POINT PLEASE. NOT 9:10, NOT 9:13, JUST CUT TO 9:14

  11. 苦白石【CleanClouds Channel】
    苦白石【CleanClouds Channel】 February 26, 2018

    censors dildoshows it up next video Oh yes, classical cowchop

  12. Wiktoria Ś.
    Wiktoria Ś. February 26, 2018

    James is thicc again

  13. Elise
    Elise February 27, 2018

    Maybe I'm just having a weird day, but when james started cracking up during the drug test bit I had tears running down my face. oh man.

  14. michael harmon
    michael harmon February 27, 2018

    New favorite channel

  15. Mack Anderson
    Mack Anderson February 27, 2018

    Aparently using the promocode on the canadian version of dollar shave club doesnt exist soooo

  16. Pachas72
    Pachas72 February 28, 2018

    6:37 I love when they do this..

  17. marmalade
    marmalade February 28, 2018

    aleks reminds me of a mcpoyle brother in the nicest way possible

  18. torpedo gamer
    torpedo gamer February 28, 2018

    Who else is here form ifunnny

  19. FBI
    FBI February 28, 2018

    11:35 is your iFunny destination thank you for your visit!

  20. Slothpunk
    Slothpunk February 28, 2018

    I love this video, favorite video this year from them

  21. TheeCowGamer
    TheeCowGamer February 28, 2018

    hahahahhahaha so good

  22. ᅚSparky
    ᅚSparky February 28, 2018

    So I work at Amazon and those yellow packages called jiffys I hate them they are fucking impossible to sort when they all come down at once

  23. Otto von Bismarck
    Otto von Bismarck March 1, 2018

    Why did Alex get James leftist propoganda?

  24. FrostiFusi0nZ_
    FrostiFusi0nZ_ March 2, 2018

    Is it me or does James' hair look like Usopp from One Piece lol (his post time-skip version)

  25. SOFx Bubbles
    SOFx Bubbles March 3, 2018

    I want that kickass Cowchop lanyard that I can't find in the merch shop 🐮🔪

  26. ANTBOSS 123
    ANTBOSS 123 March 10, 2018

    go to 13:45 its so good

  27. Guess the tank Ifunny
    Guess the tank Ifunny March 11, 2018

    The book of lies

  28. ozuma35
    ozuma35 March 12, 2018

    I love Cow Chop but those squiggly cups are bullshit. £10.95 or just go to any £1 shop

  29. Blake
    Blake March 14, 2018

    That thing costs 130$. That’s a 130$ for a fake penis and pee

  30. boneygibbon
    boneygibbon March 16, 2018

    I actually own one of those 'crane' machines.

  31. Mason Law
    Mason Law March 18, 2018

    idk why james has such a problem with the price when his wallet holds 7,7 mill

  32. El Josh
    El Josh March 18, 2018

    I fucking love jame’s laugh dude, it makes the mood really brighten up

  33. DemonKingMidas0011
    DemonKingMidas0011 March 20, 2018

    420K Views!!! I'l Dab to That!!!

  34. Sun Sigil
    Sun Sigil March 27, 2018

    Pulls of big mustache to reveal sad baby mustache…. 5/10

  35. TY.Bambi
    TY.Bambi March 31, 2018

    That background music that was playing what game is that from it was in the beginning

  36. Truly Infamous
    Truly Infamous April 5, 2018

    I'd love for Aleks to walk into the office with that fake dick coming out of his pants and him act like nothing's wrong.

  37. Slamgamming
    Slamgamming April 5, 2018

    mute video play at 11:00 and listen to this at same time https://youtu.be/djV11Xbc914?t=19

  38. Nikki Googs
    Nikki Googs April 14, 2018

    Laughed so hard

  39. ZeliGrote$que
    ZeliGrote$que April 17, 2018

    BOLLAR BAVE BLUB

  40. Geisse boeckli-
    Geisse boeckli- April 17, 2018

    Why do you censor the dick but not the dragon dick

  41. DevilsSi1481
    DevilsSi1481 April 18, 2018

    😉😁😁😁😁😁😭😭😭😢😢😑😑

  42. That One Cover Guy
    That One Cover Guy April 21, 2018

    I too strangle the hell out of my shlong in order to pee properly

  43. TheGrayBear
    TheGrayBear April 21, 2018

    I guess they really are… Best Mates

  44. Ronnie Rubel
    Ronnie Rubel April 22, 2018

    Why do they have Russian captions on every video

  45. Briar Williams
    Briar Williams April 26, 2018

    I watched this at a highschool

  46. Andy Smh
    Andy Smh May 6, 2018

    🤣

  47. CCzarMasta56
    CCzarMasta56 May 10, 2018

    This episode had me like Aleks, pissing myself laughing.

  48. Svein Arne Løkken
    Svein Arne Løkken May 10, 2018

    you gonna start reading a lot? dinosaur noises

  49. KRS KA
    KRS KA May 14, 2018

    Dont buy this shit they dont work… just loose of money

  50. Kibaboyisme
    Kibaboyisme May 18, 2018

    That was a spot on Clint Eastwood impression 😂

  51. god himself
    god himself May 26, 2018

    best episode by far

  52. Trent Desolate
    Trent Desolate May 31, 2018

    your payed promotions suck

  53. SirUncleDolan
    SirUncleDolan May 31, 2018

    10/10 gameplay

  54. Olivia R
    Olivia R May 31, 2018

    james wheezes are the best

  55. Chrystal Aponte
    Chrystal Aponte June 2, 2018

    9:41 Two guys and one cup

  56. CrazedSymptoms
    CrazedSymptoms June 3, 2018

    Did Trevor leave

  57. Rory
    Rory June 7, 2018

    I MISS TREVORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

  58. LupedaG
    LupedaG June 10, 2018

    Aleks said ni*ga at 12:27 XD

  59. superswaglord1945
    superswaglord1945 June 11, 2018

    6:37 HAVE YOU EVER HAD A DREAMS…

  60. Milky
    Milky June 13, 2018

    13:58 i could not stop laughing when he broke the claw machine

  61. Andrija Nikolic
    Andrija Nikolic June 15, 2018

    Whats the retro 80s song ?

  62. Oronk
    Oronk June 28, 2018

    nah, you study.

  63. Narskii
    Narskii July 2, 2018

    9:34 Is how porn starts?

  64. Kieran Green
    Kieran Green July 5, 2018

    9:17

  65. Alexander Hammond
    Alexander Hammond July 7, 2018

    I remember the good ole days when they didn't have to blur dicks.

  66. A Fish
    A Fish July 7, 2018

    I love Billy

  67. MiddleMang
    MiddleMang July 20, 2018

    6:37

  68. Chris Long
    Chris Long July 21, 2018

    The fucked up thing is the fact 3$ per game thing is real at a carnival I want to for popping ballons and I wasted 20$ on a prize that was so cheap for them that I wanted to weep

  69. Ben Bletz
    Ben Bletz July 22, 2018

    This is the first time I've ever laughed myself to tears

  70. Kool Aid Cobain
    Kool Aid Cobain July 23, 2018

    That wrestler was RVD (Rob Van Dam) if anyone was wondering.

  71. FoxxLostSon_ _
    FoxxLostSon_ _ July 31, 2018

    Dick falls “oh no”?

  72. Michael Sotomayor
    Michael Sotomayor July 31, 2018

    better content than netflix

  73. Jacob Black
    Jacob Black August 3, 2018

    Does anyone know where I can find the video with the clip of Aleks destroying the cabinet in the beginning

  74. Sam Iurillo
    Sam Iurillo August 3, 2018

    13:59 sounds like a gunshot

  75. bbhd
    bbhd August 6, 2018

    Dollar shave club is TRASSSSSH

  76. AlienGuy16
    AlienGuy16 August 8, 2018

    James wasn't having any of aleks' shit at the end lmao

  77. Ian Scott
    Ian Scott August 13, 2018

    Your show would be better if you guys wouldn't make it political.

  78. Katelyn Grace
    Katelyn Grace August 22, 2018

    10:31 Dont worry Aleks I hate when my dick falls off too.

  79. Kenzee KTO
    Kenzee KTO August 23, 2018

    I’m so fucking done

  80. Marco Tonutto
    Marco Tonutto August 26, 2018

    I miss Trevor

  81. Madame Kipperoni
    Madame Kipperoni August 28, 2018

    I had that exact crane, my childhoodod is flashing before my eyes

  82. Zach E
    Zach E August 29, 2018

    Dat Halo 3 poster at 11:40 doh…

  83. SirenRain
    SirenRain September 2, 2018

    not the squiggly cup ;___;

  84. xXiXx
    xXiXx September 8, 2018

    For someone whos signature thing is yelling and breaking shit, james is pretty damn horrible at acting angry on the spot

  85. Ruchin Khangar
    Ruchin Khangar October 2, 2018

    Dude this was a good ass episode

  86. Daygoo _
    Daygoo _ October 27, 2018

    I cant even imagine how much money they waste just for a bit lmao

  87. BoxGaming
    BoxGaming November 5, 2018

    Why cant Stevie Wonder read?

  88. Kevinn Genovese
    Kevinn Genovese November 6, 2018

    I see you

  89. AwfulMusik
    AwfulMusik November 20, 2018

    I miss Trevor…

  90. TheLuggy
    TheLuggy February 4, 2019

    Holy shit.
    In the Mafia series.
    Lindsay is wearing that suit that Aleks wears for the claw machine bit.
    Lindsay pulled a tiny dinosaur out of her pocket in one of the Mafia episodes.
    Aleks put the tiny dinosaur in his pocket during the claw machine bit.

    Extended tiny dinosaur lore.

  91. thisistheworstthingiveeverfuckingseen
    thisistheworstthingiveeverfuckingseen March 4, 2019

    Song at 11:00 ?

  92. Colin Ying
    Colin Ying March 19, 2019

    I miss this and the thing is it’s never coming back

  93. Ryu Kamazaki [Raven]
    Ryu Kamazaki [Raven] April 7, 2019

    outro music?

  94. R&N RailProductions
    R&N RailProductions May 15, 2019

    8:17 that wheeze

  95. Olorin The Otaku
    Olorin The Otaku June 23, 2019

    That drug test was honestly the funniest thing I've seen in a long time.

  96. John Bohn
    John Bohn July 5, 2019

    This is the best piece of media I’ve ever witnessed.

  97. Jaime Echartea
    Jaime Echartea July 7, 2019

    Alec

  98. A-A- A
    A-A- A August 15, 2019

    I miss papa james

  99. Bigcods
    Bigcods August 26, 2019

    Lmao the dinosaur Alex’s puts in the jacket pocket returns when Lindsey wears it for mafia and pulls it out at the start of one of the episodes.

  100. Igor Tadic
    Igor Tadic August 28, 2019

    Hey the tiny red dinosaur in the jacket that Lindsey found later while playing MAFIA 😂

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